TERM |
MEANING |
|---|---|
| Analog | Hors d'oeuvre, usually made from cheese, covered with crushed nuts |
| Backup | Opposite of go forward |
| Batch Processing | Making a lot of cookies at once |
| Binary | Ability to have friends of both sexes |
| Bit | 12 ¸ cents |
| Branch | If watered, it will grow a computer club (see computer club) |
| Buffer | Programmer who works in the nude |
| Bug | Programmer's term for a feature or an elusive creature living in a program which makes it incorrect. Note: the activity of "debugging" or removing bugs from a program code ends when a programmer gets tired of doing it, not when all the bugs are removed |
| Character density | The number of weird people in the office, divided by the floor space |
| Computer | Device used to speed and automate errors |
| Computer Club | Used to strike computer forcefully upon receiving error messages |
| Coding | An addictive drug |
| Compile | Heap of decomposing vegetable matter |
| Console | What one does to a "down" computer |
| Cursor | An expert in 4-letter words |
| Dump | System Programmer's work area |
| Feature | Software or Hardware limitation as described by a marketing representative |
| Hardware | Parts of a computer which can be kicked |
| Keyboard | Instrument used for entering errors into a computer |
| Language | System of organizing and defining error messages |
| Loop | See loop |
| Machine-Independent Program | Program which will not run on any machine |
| Microcomputer | One millionth of a computer |
| Null String | Result of a 4 hour database search |
| On-line | Idea that a human should always be accessible |
| Password | Nonsense word taped to your terminal |
| Performance | Statement of the speed at which a computer operates. Or rather, might work under certain circumstances. Or was rumored to be working about a month ago |
| Quality Control | Ensuring that the quality of the product does not get out of hand and add to the cost of it's manufacture or design |
| Strategy | Long-range plan whose merit cannot be evaluated until sometime after those creating it have left the organization |
| User | Someone requiring drug rehabilitation |
| 8-bit machine | Computer selling for $1.00 (see bit) |
| 16-bit machine | Computer selling for $2.00 (see bit) |
| 32-bit machine | Computer selling for $4.00 (see bit) |
| 64-bit machine | Computer selling for $8.00 (see bit) |
This page was last updated on Saturday, 18 March 2006
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